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“sometimes i go back to it cause i see and hear people recommending it then when i get a few hours into it i'm like "dafuq am i back doing this shit". Sometimes my self confidence goes way up and I think I can hack it on tinder.
So yeah i was lucky I have probably the worst case of ghosting that I have ever seen. I know people who have found true love on those apps, but I don't think I'll be one of them, and I was wasting a LOT of time with people who were "meh."What I'm trying to say is you're lucky and don't get divorced, probably. The process is placed into a weird addictive context. So here is the kicker, after a goes by, out of the blue we text again, and go on another date. She even ended the night by saying, "next time you'll have to come up to see my apartment" as I dropped her off. My husband and I met over twenty years ago via Usenet, and it really is weird how in the past ~5 years people have gone from "omg! So you get random matches based on a compulsive activity where people are inherently always looking for something else, and the various dimensions of compatibility beyond "I like the picture" are ignored. It's like the illuminati developed a way to limit our reproduction. If you find one thing that you don't like, and even the best loving relationships people have things they don't like about the other person, you can just move onto the next one. Too many options too, you could hit it off with someone on one site then they completely stop using it and you're ghosted.I think it does terrible things for our self-confidence....I did online dating for a few years, but just like OP's explanation notes, it's hard to get quality without wasting a lot of time.
So I stopped online dating and am having a much, much more pleasant and promising dating experience now. "It also seems like the criteria for matches have gone from fairly comprehensive to ... They have to be close, and you have to swipe their picture. It's depressing because it's slim pickings in terms of finding anyone dateable that isn't some sort of freaky couple where the woman is looking to find mr goodbar or the chronically single, and even the ones that you feel are below your standards are is true too, like you go on a date with person A but then you've matched with person B and C but you haven't gone on a date with them.You had fun with A but what if you have more fun with B and C, lets not commit anymore time to A before you test the waters with the other two, then next thing you know its 2 weeks later, you've had your dates with B and C but A is turned off by the radio silence and you're left with trying to find some D.My husband and I also met online, yet I consistently notice that other friends our age have zero luck.We met seven years ago and I think you are completely correct that there are just too many people.One of the reasons ghosting is so prevalent is that when it comes to rejection, people can be very unpredictable in their responses. Yet people don't need a "good reason" to say NO.